Its science: people who buy organic food are smug assholes



If all organic snobs were as cool as Seth and Munchie, we wouldn't have this problem

 As it turns out, new research has determined that a judgmental attitude may just go hand in hand with exposure to organic foods. In fact, a new study published this week in the journal of Social Psychological and Personality Science, has found that organic food may just make people act a bit like jerks.

"There's something about being exposed to organic food that made them feel better about themselves," says Eskine. "And that made them kind of jerks a little bit, I guess.  "Why does eating better make us act worse? Eskine says it probably has to do with what he calls "moral licensing."  "People may feel like they've done their good deed," he says. "That they have permission, or license, to act unethically later on."

Well, science has spoken and confirmed what I've thought for years - people who buy organic are assholes.  Just self-righteous, snobby jerks who love putting themselves on their imaginary moral pedestal while disdainfully looking down on everyone else.  You can also throw hybrid/electric car owners in this group as well.  People who are so insecure about themselves they buy crappy food and ugly, underperforming cars so they can achieve a perceived boost to their own bizarre standards of character and integrity.  Its sad really. 

If only more organic nazi's took after Seth and Munchie, successful organic juice manufacturers, who finally came to accept reality and successfully balance the worlds of buying organic foods and living amicably among their fellow man.

Homer:    Heads up!
Seth:     Hey!  It's Homer Jay!
Munchie:  My man!  You've gone granola!
Homer:    Right on!
Seth:     Join the hack!
[the two hippies kick it around a bit, then pass it to Homer, who lofts it into the nearby pond]
Homer:    That was cool.  Think I'll stick around.  We've got everything we need right here.  Good times, sunshine, free love ... [makes purring noise]
[suddenly, the sound of a buzzer interrupts the peace]
Munchie:  Okay, time to get back to work.
Homer:    Work?  But you're hippies!
Seth:     Oh, we were on a break.
Munchie:  Time is money, man!
Seth:     We are the largest organic juice company in Springfield.
Munchie:  We grow our own vegetables and process them right here!  And we give half the profits to war orphans.
Homer:    Profits, profits, profits!  What kind of hippies are you?  Peter Fonda must be spinning in his grave.
Seth:     We're just trying to pay the bills, Homer.  I mean, we're still hippies at heart.
Homer:    Oh yeah, when's the last time you freaked out the establishment?  You guys are total sell-outs!
Munchie:  Wait ... don't you work for a nuclear power plant?
Homer:    Look, we can sit here all day, and play the blame game, or we can start freaking people out.  Come on, where's your freak bus?
Seth:     I drive a Saturn.